Delivering You with Two Faces.

Its amazing how two-faced customers can really be. One minute they are all smiles and happiness and then next, when they don't get what they want because you just can't do it, they turn mean and nasty. It's not something that I can control and I do apologise for not being able to meet with your demands but is it necessary to be so mean and vindictive? Did you ever think that being that mean will actually get you something? And when you are inquiring or asking a question it does not mean the answer that I give you will always be the one that you want to hear.

Tonight was quite an eventful night, in the good sense. What happened didn't really bother me because quite frankly it happens quite often, and also it was a good night so I'm not fussed by ridiculous customers.


Take Away phone rings.

Me: Good Evening.
Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer: Hi, I just wanted to order a delivery order. You do delivery right.

I'd like to point out that a lot of customers have tried the method 'If I say you delivery, you'll deliver to me'.

Me: No sorry we don't do deliveries. Only Pick Up orders.
Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer: Oh really. I thought you guys always did delivery.

I've worked at the restaurant for five years. The first two years there was a delivery service because Our Boss had just started out and we wanted to branch out to form a bigger customer base. Eventually, we weren't really making that much off deliveries and there was no point in hiring a delivery driver. So in the end we phased out the deliveries, THREE YEARS AGO. I'd also like to point out that even though we did do them in the beginning we never printed it or advertised this to our customers, therefore there is nothing that says we actually do deliveries. Customers find this hard to understand.

Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer: Oh, but you use to didn't you?

Now the answer to this depends on how cheeky I am on the night. I usually apologise and let it go. Or some times it goes like this.

Me: [Laughing a little]. We haven't done deliveries in almost three years.
Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer: Oh, but you guys delivered to me the other week. I'm sure of it.

So some customers like to pull the method, 'If I lie about you delivering to me, then you have to do it'. I turn around and give them this method, 'You and I both know you're lying but I'll just let you know gently so you know not to try that again'.

Me: Sorry, but we don't do deliveries. You must have remembered the wrong place.
Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer: Oh okay.

You think that they finally understand but this is the part where Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer will sudden change from being quite friendly to just plain nasty. In the beginning we use to tell them that they can come down to get it and that it would be much quicker that way. This usually causes a really rude reaction from Two-Faced-Delivery-Customers.

Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer: How am I suppose to get down there without a car? Why do you think I ordered delivery.

I don't know. Maybe because really you are just lazy. And that's the truth with most deliveries. So nowadays we don't even give that option to Two-Faced-Delivery-Customers. If they like our food that much they will come down to get it anyway.


The conversation can end a few ways. None of them pleasant.

Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer [Response 1]: [Hangs up the phone without saying anything].

Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer [Response 2]: Well then I'll just go SOMEWHERE ELSE where there is delivery.

Two-Faced-Delivery-Customer [Response 3]: I'm sure you guys delivered to me the other day. [Hangs up without saying a word of Goodbye].



Its true. I've worked at the same restaurant for five years, but Two-Faced-Delivery-Customers seem to always know more than me. Why do I even bother.